We can’t just ignore the facts about sex trafficking around the world. Yes, it’s easier to pretend it doesn’t exist and doesn’t affect us, but what are we saying to the children who have to live that nightmare every day? Whether you become actively involved or simply make a donation to a worthy organization, please do something to let these children know you care. ♥
In 9th grade about halfway through the school year, a new girl came to class and sat next to me. She was smiling, skinny and very pretty. The boys were going crazy over her and all the girls were being snobbish toward her. Some reason Paula and I connected. She was super nice and not a snobbish cheerleader. She hung out with the bad crowd. The obvious smokers and drinkers. From her clothes we could tell she was from “The Cities” and poor. Maybe that is why we bonded, I was from a family as poor as hers.
I didn’t get to see her much because she ran with a different crowd, but we did ride the bus to and from school. With the start of 10th grade I was glad to see her still living in the area. We talked everyday on the way home from school. Most mornings, her brother would run late to the bus but Paula never showed up, but I would see her later at school.
For three days now, I’ve been trying to write this post. The problem? I’ve had some family drama to deal with and I had to process before I wrote.
No weapon formed against you shall prosper,
And every tongue which rises against you in judgment
You shall condemn.
This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD,
And their righteousness is from Me,”
Says the LORD.
About two weeks ago, I published an eBook about the abuse I suffered as a child, and now some of my family members are upset. I’ve heard all the empty excuses they could find to not respect the fact that I was victimized, but I recognize the excuses for what they are. What I see are family members who, although they know the truth, are too afraid to call it the truth. That’s on them, not on me. While I sit here and understand their reasons and show compassion, they disrespect and disown me because I told the truth. I know there’s nothing I can do about their choices; all I can do is stand by the truth and move forward with good conscience.
Once you’ve been abused as a child, it’s often difficult to spot the “red flags” waving in front of you when you start a new relationship. It seems our radar is off and we end up dating people who possess some of the same traits as our abusers. It’s not our fault; it’s just that we haven’t learned any different. Often, our self-esteem is so out of whack, we believe we deserve to be treated as less than. What we really deserve is to have a healthy relationship with someone who would never abuse or mistreat us, but instead, will lift us up and help us become a better version of ourselves.
Following is a list of the warning signs to look for when you’re dating someone new (this applies to men and women). Hopefully, you’ll be able to recognize the signs, put your running shoes on, and run the other way as fast as you can:
WARNING SIGNS OF AN ABUSIVE PERSONALITY
Something’s just not right in your relationship, and you can’t put your finger on it. So here’s some help. If your mate is displaying a combination of these behaviors, then you may have a potential batterer on your hands.
1. A PUSH FOR QUICK INVOLVEMENT: Comes on very strong, claiming, “I’ve never felt loved like this by anyone.” An abuser pressures the woman for an exclusive commitment almost immediately.
2. JEALOUSY: excessively possessive; calls constantly or visits unexpectedly; prevents you from going to work because “you might meet someone”; checks the mileage on your car.
Each day, as we’re putting together this site, I hear more and more stories of how my friends and family were abused by their parents. Whether they were sexually abused, physically or emotionally abused, or simply (not really simple at all) abandoned by a mom or dad, the numbers are staggering.
As a parent, I just don’t understand the thought process of a mom who thinks it’s okay to hit, torture, maim, shame, and disregard their child. Didn’t they learn anything during the nine months that child was growing inside them? When my children were born, it was a joyous time, and made me truly believe in a higher power. It didn’t escape my attention that there was an actual human being growing inside me, and that I had a certain responsibility to care for that human being. Considering all the women out there who can’t have children, you’d think the ones who can would take it a bit more seriously. Jesus help them all.
For all you adult children of idiotic parents, I’m sorry. I’m sorry you were treated like nothing more than garbage or an object to be used and thrown away at will. I’m sorry your parent was so immersed in their own past that they forgot how to love you and what it was like for them. I’m sorry, but I’m happy you’re alive and can speak up for those kids who don’t have a voice.